The cats are possessed

That's it, I've had enough. The tree is coming down tomorrow whether they like it or not.

Over the last 6 hours the tree has started to vibrate and occasionally shake out a cat or two. I've unplugged the lights and myself, Bob-O and the dogs are sitting waaayyyyy back and watching to see how long it takes to fall. I can't get near the tortie powering it - she's holed up in the middle creating showers of cheerful baubles at random intervals.

(a lot of the evil can be traced back to the cat-cocaine treats that their Secret Santa sent for them. At one point they were in the kitchen for safekeeping and that worked until Cheesecake found them, chewed his way through a box and foil wrapping and scoffed his own bodyweight in hallucinogenic treats. Little monster is still high - all dilated pupil'd and madly dashing for the last 36 hours)

Happy Christmas everyone

We started on a high note, opening presents from our Secret Santas:























But now the jealousy is kicking in so we've been told to go to bed and we can open the rest in the morning:























Happy Kittymas one and all!

From Homer, Luci, Mintoe, Cheesecake, Mao, Mia, Lily and Bob-O.

A day in the life of the female human

I cleaned the bathroom today.

First I cleaned the sink. Then I removed Mao from her new bed in the clean sink and cleaned it again. After that I cleaned the bath. And again after cruelly stopping Homer, Lily and Cheesecake from rolling around in the last few drops of water. They also helped (hindered) with emptying the bin and sweeping the floor.

I removed all of the cats from the bathroom before cleaning the loo though. There are some things that I just don't need feline help for :-)

Bedtime, Cheesecake style

It's 2am and I'm in bed catching up on the blogs on my Reader. Or rather I would be if I could read around Cheesecake. Or through Cheesecake for that matter. He's taken to attempting to chew the iPod if I don't pay enough attention so I'm typing this one handed and relying on the auto correct far too much.

I think I'll give up for tonight.

Cheesecake has won.

Where to start?

O Christmas Tree, O Christmas Tree....

After a couple of test runs the tree has gone up for the festive season. However I don't think it's going to be staying up for long this year :-)

I can't see Lily but I can hear a frantic bell resisting attempts to be removed from the tree.

Mao is currently swinging out of a bauble & Mia is mid level behind the tree on the shelf looking thoughtful...

Newsflash - cats being held hostage! Send help!

The female human has locked us all into the kitchen and is muttering something about a tree. We're not sure what exactly is going on but suspect she may have lost her mind, for it's a well known fact that trees grow outside and not in the sitting room. Someone should call one of those doctors with the white coats to take the poor unfortunate away. I'd do it but I'm being held hostage obviously (send help!). Unless...

Oh no...

You don't think a tree has fallen into the house do you!? We could escape! We could be free!

There might be a bird in it. Or a gerbil. Or a rabbit - imagine a whole rabbit! OMG! I need to get in there to see this tree, now!

Somebody please send help!!

Late night amusings

Cheesecake lives separately from the other cats (and the dogs) at the moment as we don't want to overwhelm him. He's come from being a single, adored and pampered housecat to living with the Feline Horde, the Canine Horde, the gerbils and general busyness.

OH (who may also be known as the male human) just came back in from the sitting room to ask if what Cheesecake was telling him was true. "Huh?" says I.

OH had found Cheesecake at the other end of the house watching his new favourite toy - the gerbils. Totally relaxed, ignoring the other cats and giving off the impression that he was allowed in there unattended all of the time dontchaknow. Of course this may have been helped by the fact that the dogs were outside... :-)

Cheesecake is now back in the kitchen, mightily displeased at being separated from his gerbils.

Did we take out insurance on the humans?

The female human appears to have cat-flu; she's coughing, off her food and generally lethargic. She's showing no interest in playing with the DaBird that I've so thoughtfully fetched for her and she's not complaining when I try to smother her (in a loving way, honest!).

Anyway, she'll probably need to go to the vet in a small dark box and then she'll be stuck with needles and have all manner of unmentionable things done to her while I hold her down and tell her it's for her own good.

Bout time it happened to one of them.

Haaaahahahahahahaha!

An excerpt from Cheesecake's Diary, Day 6

Support staff were late home last night (something about a Christmas party though I don't remember giving them permission to go out?) and also slept in this morning (Note: May need to start disciplinary proceedings, this is most disappointing and I suspect they may not last the full probationary period). They did at least remember to run the tap for me for several minutes so I could perform my daily ablutions. I then spent the afternoon catching up on my beauty sleep in the sock drawer - my new favourite place to snooze.

Met the canine slaves this evening. Do not trust them, especially the big one (suspect it's on growth hormones - for something that size is just not natural), but then I spotted some small funny looking rodent things in a large glass container and became distracted. Despite spending a significant amount of time on this project I cannot figure out how to get lid off and suspect the Moving Dinner container is faulty (Note: Escalate this issue with the support staff, requires followup. Also - need to bill for my time). Briefly met the other cats but they too were trying to open the Moving Dinner container so we just exchanged names. Will catch up later.

Thoroughly enjoyed the new cat food produced for my dining pleasure at suppertime. It's called Applaws and is far better than the other substandard dry food the human has been feeding me. I have proclaimed that it will do, though I would still prefer one of those rodents...

Off to snooze for a while now in front of the fire. Will report in later.